IN MEMORY OF THOMAS CRAPPER

http://online.wsj.com/news/articles/SB10001424052702304854804579234082436462904
If you go to the above web site you will find the 6 December 2013 Wall Street Journal article about the Plumbing Museum in Watertown, Massachusetts. Thomas Crapper’s name is discussed. BTW – Tom’s name was given to the toilet, not the other way around. This ditty is one of the collection in my booklet, Days of Yore.

IN MEMORY OF THOMAS CRAPPER

(Thomas Crapper was a nineteenth Century English plumber
whose flushing toilet brought great change to households
everywhere.)

In days when folks were rarely known
To have flush toilets on the ‘Throne”,
A London plumber rose to fame.
Thomas Crapper was his name.

His patent shows a valveless pot
Of clean and shiny terra-cot.
Just pull the chain, the water flows.
And down the drain the sewage goes.

Well, smart as he was it’s no surprise
That Crapper knew how to advertise.
“An easy pull brings a certain flush.
No wait, no mess, no toilet brush.”

It’s phrases like that from a plumber, you see.
That are certain to appeal to royalty.
“Install the system!” his sovereign said.
“Replace the pots beneath the bed.”

Dukes and Duchesses, Counts and clowns.
Ladies in their fancy gowns,
Gentlemen portly and gentlemen dapper
Went to the Queen’s to see “The Crapper”.

Quickly the word spread, far and wide,
About the Queen’s new joy and pride.
And ancient castles replaced the trench
With the famous pot that reduced the stench.

First the nobles, then the gentry
Accepted Tom’s pot as elementary
Until throughout the British Isles
Tom’s system flushed the pooper piles.

With this to his credit, it’s sad to relate
Time slandered Tom by a quirk of fate.
A man of his genius deserves riches and fame.
And all that he got was a dirty name.

Don Hubbard ©